No doubt what has happened to Roger Gorley, as detailed in this report, is contemptible beyond words, but to discuss this event only within the framework of how marriage equality would have avoided such an instance is totally short-sighted. LGBTIQ should not continue privileging marriage as the only other legitimate relationship that deserves the right to be with a partner/family member in the time of medical crisis. We must insist that family is not (just) a matter of blood relations or even a marriage permit, but something more expansive that include close friends/life-long platonic companions, caretakers, etc. who deserve the right to be along the beside of an ailing loved one.

So let’s not just posit this a marriage equality issue when the larger issue is the more inclusive understanding of family, its legitimacy, and the rights they too should have.   

[Photo via The Raw Story]

Best Note From Dad After Overhearing Son Debating Coming Out

The postscript to this note slays me with joy.

South China Morning Post reports that parents of over 100 Chinese gays and lesbians have written an open letter to the National People’s Congress demanding marriage equality for the nation’s gays and lesbians. 

Below is the letter (in Simplified Chinese):

百余位同性恋者的父母致信全国人大代表

      呼吁同性婚姻立法的公开信

尊敬的全国人大代表您好！

   

    我们来自五湖四海，我们的孩子是同性恋者，我们被称为“同志父母”，我们的孩子因为同性倾向原因，无法与相爱的人合法组成家庭，结为“夫夫或妇妇”，给生活和就医等诸多方面带来不便。

 

    按照社会学常识，同性恋者约占总人口的3-5%，照此推算，中国约有6000万同性恋者，他们因为现行的《婚姻法》规定只能一男一女结合，而被排斥在婚姻殿堂之外。我们的孩子有些跟同性伴侣已生活了近10年，他们相互照应，相亲相爱，却不能在另一伴生病需要手术时合法签字。身为同性恋者的家长，我们时常感到焦虑，因为不能合法结婚，我们孩子在领养下一代、生病手术签字、继承伴侣财产、甚至买房等各方面都受到不同程度的影响。

    匪夷所思的是，我们的同性恋孩子尽管不爱异性，却拥有合法与异性结婚的权利。众所周知，同性恋与异性结婚，造成“同妻”、“同夫”等严重的社会问题，也让更多的人生活不幸福。难道我们的法律是要鼓励同性恋与异性结婚吗？

 

    另外，同性恋并不违反任何现行的中国法律，同性恋者是具有各项权利的中华人民共和国公民，同性恋者的结婚权利不能长期被剥夺。

 

    我们恳请全国人大代表和政协委员们给予关注，倾听1.2亿“同志家长”的心声，体恤6000万同性恋者对平等和尊严的渴盼，呼吁尽早修改《婚姻法》，让中国6000万同性恋公民拥有平等的婚姻权。

 

    感谢您在百忙之中关注此事，并祝工作愉快，身体健康！

 

    此致

 

    敬礼！                          

                          同性恋亲友会家长群部分家长

                                   2013年2月25日

Dear Customer who stuck up for his little brother,

(Source: kissing-whiskey)

Fran Drescher of course isn’t the only woman to have been faced with the life transformation when her spouse comes out as gay. This piece shows a little of what to expect when this happens.

Two Dads Are Better Than None

Jesus Had Two Dads, Why Can’t I?

(Source: princepadraic)

After 30 years of restrictive family size controlling known as the one-child policy, China looks to perhaps ease rules after this year’s census, using its data to inform reform.

A cultural preference toward having sons has created a surplus, or rather, a sex imbalance with an estimated 24 million more men of “marriageable age (roughly 19 to 45)” than women, reports USA Today.

+ here

So what do you do when the law won’t permit you to be with the most meaningful person in your life?

Simple. You break it.

So advises Lauren Smiley at SF Weekly. But the broader question of law and policy isn’t simply about same-sex marriage, as has been the main focus of many many gay civil rights organizations, but rather about immigration reform that needs to address queer families not defined by what sex one’s partner is, or biological progeny, but rather the qualitative relationships that constitute “family.”

Read more on immigration rights and its intersection with same-sex marriage here.

We love queer’d pop culture/daily life graphics! This one, about families, obviously.

(via gay-mania:monsieurpaloma:danielstick:smdoc)